Philosophy

The word is not the thing. The image is not the thing. The concept is not the thing. The memory is not the thing.

So, what then is the thing? It can be experienced but not known. You can taste it but not speak it. You can speak it but not hear it. You can hear it but not see it. You can see it but not touch it. You can touch it but not conceive it. It is what it is not.

This is the secret… this is the key; to know it as unknowable. Only then will you experience it – whatever “it” is.

The word “green” is not green. The image “green” is not green. The concept “green” is not green. The memory “green” is not green.

So, what then is green? It is what it is not. This is the secret… this is the key; to know it as unknowable. Only then will you experience it – whatever “it” is.

It's been a while since I've written anything on my blog... something I've been meaning to remedy for some time now. With my 17th Anniversary upon me, it seems appropriate to write at length about marriage today. What better way to get back into the swing of things, don't you agree?

People get married for all kinds of reasons. I'm sure, on the surface, many people would say they get married because they're in love. They "love" an other and want to stay with that other forever. The other agrees, and they choose to formalize their agreement to stay together legally through marriage. There's a definite weight to the formality of legally binding marriage that you cannot easily ignore. It's easy to say "I love you baby"... but it's another thing entirely to promise, under threat of legal recourse, to stay with someone until death. Marriage, as a contract, is an interesting beast with fascinating undercurrents of mistrust, insecurity and control.

Because of this, there is a growing segment of the population that decides to pass on marriage altogether. I can see their thinking. I mean, if two people really "love" each other then why do they need a legally binding contract to prove it or to back it up? There's a nugget of truth in that statement. It makes some sense, doesn't it?

From a purely financial benefit, there's at least two good reasons to be married over just living together: tax breaks and health insurance. To those of you that have decided to live together but are fearful of marriage, don't forget about the financial benefits of "tying the knot."

Beyond the financial benefits, there's a much deeper value to marriage that I've discovered over the years. One that I feel compelled to share with you. I'm coming to that, albeit through a slow and meandering path.

Love in marriage is wonderful if you have it. I observe that many people do not have it. They have dependence and requirement. Love is the happy result of seeing reality. In marriage, just like in the rest of life, people refuse to see what's in front of them. They are focused on The Image and not on reality at all.

Many people never make it to this point of seeing reality and so they never truly love. If you're fortunate enough to brush with death, you may catch a glimpse of it. Yet, can you get there without suffering or mortal peril?

Anyone that's been married for enough years will tell you that your "love" for each other changes over time. At first, there's the excitement of a new relationship. You're busy enjoying each other -- especially where you fulfill each other's needs in new ways (sexually, financially, conversationally, emotionally, etc.) But, as time passes, you habituate to one another. You become used to each other. The initial excitement passes and you are left with the day-to-day drudgery of real life. Raising kids and paying bills....

What happens once you know your spouse completely and totally? When you know all their habits... all their insecurities... all their fears... all their interests... all their jokes... all their stories... all their history? What's left after you can no longer be surprised by your spouse? What then?

I tell you, it's just at this moment of habituation that the true value of marriage becomes easiest to see. It took me years to get to that point of habituation with my wife. And, it took me a few more years still to see what was really before my eyes. Do you know what I saw... and what I continue to see?

I see perfection. After the infatuation passes and there's nothing else to learn, what's left is the reality: Perfection. Seeing past the habituation and into the perfection... in this way marriage is a blessed spiritual practice.

My wife, Heather, is perfection itself. Does this mean she doesn't make mistakes? No. Does this mean that she's got a perfect body? No. That she never gets angry? No. That she's always polite? No! These things are a determination of the mind. A comparison of perception to the stored memory of ideals. This is not what I mean. I've discovered that building a relationship on the comparison of perception to ideals is a fool's errand. There is no capacity for love or happiness in that direction. Stay away from there!

Heather is, quite literally, perfection. There is not a thing about her I would change. Not one. Can you say the same about your spouse?

My relationship with Heather has given me a gift of incalculable value: sight of reality. Perception of perfection. Through the years of struggle trying to make Heather in my image of her there was finally acceptance. After acceptance there was sight of reality... of perfection.

This is the "secret" to a happy marriage. Seeing the perfection. Once you see it, there's no turning back. There's no harm that can be done. You are at peace regardless of what happens. You'll ride the roller coaster of marriage and know it's a ride. Finally.

The most breathtaking thing for me is how Heather has done this for me without a thought or intention. She's simply being herself. Yet, through her unconscious "selfness", I have received this greatest of gifts.

There are no words powerful enough to thank her... no gesture grand enough to encapsulate my thanks. And, so, I sit dumbfounded as I contemplate the awesomeness of her perfection and the invaluable impact she's had on my life.

I see you Heather and love you. Thank you so much for being.

Do you want to know about an idea that causes much pain and upset in the world? Perfection is just such an idea. The idea of perfection causes untold misery as countless people all over the world chase after it. Have you ever suffered because of the idea of perfection? If so then it may serve you to dive deeply into the idea of perfection and see for yourself what it really is. Through understanding of perfection you may free yourself from its illusory power over you and your happiness.

What is perfection? It’s an idea of something without any flaw. If someone has perfect skin then it must be without blemish or discoloration. If a dance routine is to be perfect then it must be performed without any mistake. If a computer program is perfect then it will never crash. It seems to me that perfection and flawlessness is the same thing. If something is perfect then it has no flaws. If there is a flaw in something then it cannot be perfect. Perfection is the lack of imperfection. That seems simple enough.

Since perfection exists only in the absence of imperfection…this begs the question: What is imperfection? Have you ever answered that question before? Take some time right now and come up with an answer for yourself. I’ll wait. Do you have an answer? Good! Keep on reading…

So, what is imperfection? Perhaps you came to the conclusion that imperfection is the lack of perfection! While that may be an accurate statement, it doesn’t get us to a clear understanding of what imperfection is. That will just lead us in circles. My take on imperfection is this: Imperfection is when something in reality doesn’t match your image of how it ought to be. In your mind you have an image of how things need to be. A flaw exists in something when it doesn’t match your image of it. Imperfection exists when your image of reality doesn’t match actual reality. Let’s look at some examples to make sure we fully understand this.

In your mind, you have an idea of perfect skin. Perhaps you learned this idea of perfect skin from television or advertisements or from observing beautiful people. Regardless of how the idea came to be in your mind, you clearly have it. Your idea of perfect skin may not match someone else’s idea of perfect skin. No matter. You still keep your idea of perfect skin and judge yourself and others based on it. When you get a zit your image of perfect skin is violated. When you get wrinkles your image of perfect skin is violated. If you didn’t have the idea of perfect skin then you’d never know when your skin was imperfect. Isn’t that obvious?

In your mind, you have an idea of the perfect person. This image of the perfect person has a lot of qualities. They never steal, lie, argue or sin. They’re always polite, kind, gentle and thoughtful. They always say the right thing at the right time. They never do anything to hurt you or anyone else. Perhaps you learned this idea of the perfect person from your religion or through the judgments of others on your behavior. Regardless of how the idea came to be in your mind, you clearly have it. Your idea of the perfect person may not match someone else’s idea of the perfect person. No matter. You still keep your idea of the perfect person and judge yourself and others based on it. When you act in a way that violates your idea of perfection then you judge yourself. When someone else acts in a way that violates your idea of perfection then you judge them. If you didn’t have the idea of the perfect person then you’d never know when you were being imperfect. Isn’t that obvious?

The fact that your ideas of perfection don’t match everyone else’s should make clear the reality of perfection. Perfection is an illusion created by belief in The Image of how things ought to be. You believe that, to be perfect, things must be a certain way. This belief exists only in your mind – in The Image. Perfection, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. What is imperfect for you will be perfect for someone else. Say that to yourself 1000 times until it sinks in.

How does all this cause suffering and pain? It does so through judgment. You judge yourself when you don’t meet your idea of perfection. You beat yourself up for your flaws. You judge others when they don’t meet your idea of perfection. You make them wrong and think negatively about them. It’s the self-torture caused by the idea of perfection that interests me the most. Most immediately is the self-torture caused by not meeting your own idea of perfection. Secondarily is the self-torture caused by not meeting someone else’s idea of perfection. Both forms of emotional torture are self-induced and based on how you see yourself in relationship to the image of perfection.

In reality there’s no such thing as imperfection. Imperfection only exists when you compare reality to an ideal state that only exists in The Image. The wonderful conclusion that comes from this observation is obvious: Perfection is all there is. When you see something that isn’t perfect, look again…it is only your judgment about it that makes it imperfect. There is nothing in reality that is imperfect. There is only your judgment about the world that causes imperfection to exist.

If you find yourself locked in self-torture because of the illusion of imperfection then remind yourself that all you must do is to see clearly. See clearly that imperfection is an illusion of The Image. All things are perfect in this moment now. It cannot be any other way. See clearly that imperfection is a lie that we’ve told ourselves and we use this lie to torture ourselves with bad feelings. The moment that you see this clearly for yourself will be the moment that you are finally free to be whoever and whatever you want to be.

Here’s an interesting observation: The only power that you have is your power of intention. Yes, you read that right…intention is your only true power. I can imagine your protests. You might ask: “What about my power to read and write?” or “What about my power to speak or to drive or to walk?” or “For goodness’ sake, what about my power to think?” Even in the face of such objections, I’ll persist that the power of intention is your only true power. Let me explain how that works and how I see that observation as being useful.

How is it that intention is your only true power? That’s simple. Without intention, no other power you would claim is possible. Let’s consider that for a moment. What can you do that you don’t first have the intention to do? Is it possible to do a thing without intention? Can you think without intending to think? Can you walk without the intention to walk? How about speaking or reading or writing? Are any of these possible without intention? Of course not…clearly intention is the source of all these powers. Take away intention and watch how you become a stagnant lump of barely living flesh.

How is this observation useful? I find these kinds of first-principle observations useful because they help me to focus on what really matters in my life. I use this observation to clear away all of the mental rubbish that drains me of vital energy and keeps me from my goals. What kind of mental rubbish? Thoughts like “How will I ever get that done on time” or “That’s too difficult for me” or “Will I be successful”. In the light of this observation, the true value of each of these thoughts is made clear to me. Such negative thinking is clearly useless and self-defeating. More importantly, just like every other thing that I do, these thoughts only arise when I intend for them to. So, I use the observation that intention is my only power to be extremely purposeful about what I think and do. If something is happening to me that I don’t want then I see clearly how I caused it to exist through my intention and choose again.

Like so many things, there’s a subtlety here that may be easily missed. While it’s clear to me that intention is the source of all power – and, by extension, your only true power – there’s also a matter of habit that must be understood in order to take advantage of your power. Habit is an extremely easy way to live your life. To do something by habit is to work from a playbook of options based on past experience. To do something habitually means that you do the same thing you’ve done before in similar situations. For mechanical things like breathing and walking, habit seems to be the best way to handle things. I mean, imagine if you forgot to breathe one day! That would be disastrous. However, when it comes to intention, habit is terribly destructive.

If your intention is habitual then you will react to situations based on how you’ve reacted to them in the past. You will miss the wonderful opportunities for self-creation that appear before you every single day. Habitual intention is the same as robotic living. Do you want to be loved out of habit? Of course not… you might as well have a robot saying and doing the things that are called “loving”. Do you want to work by habit? If you do then you will soon find yourself in a dead-end job that takes you nowhere fast. Do you want to be a robot? If not, then see the dangers of habit when applied to your intentions.

The only thing keeping you from achieving your goals is your intention. Your life is exactly how you intend it to be. It cannot be any other way. If you want your life to be different then change your intentions about it. Be aware of your habitual intentions and stop giving them energy. Drop the intentions that you currently hold and choose the intentions that will bring you to the life that you desire. Intention is your only true power…so don’t waste it on destructive pursuits. Intend with consciousness, not habit, and you will finally see the limitlessness of what you can achieve.

Watch your choices and you will see the underlying intention. Be aware of your intention and you will understand the incredible power it represents. Understand the power of intention and you will love the life that you create with it.

Have you ever heard the saying: “Sometimes the best place to hide something is in plain sight?” When I think of the plasticity of belief, that saying immediately comes to mind. Not because it’s been hidden by someone, but because it’s out in plain sight yet so few people see it! So few people notice the plasticity of belief, it might as well be hidden at the bottom of the deepest ocean. One of the quickest ways to take conscious control over your emotions and your life experience is to use the plasticity of belief. Harness the plasticity of belief and you will be amazed at what you can accomplish!

What exactly do I mean when I say plasticity of belief? I mean that your beliefs can be changed. Beliefs are changeable… malleable… flexible… alterable… rewritable… controllable... selectable. I mean that belief is like mental clay…it can be molded into whatever shape you choose. Your beliefs are your clay and you are the artist! Are you happy with your sculpture today?

Do you see the plasticity of your beliefs yet? Every belief that you have in The Image has been created by you and you alone. It’s easy to get caught up in the idea that some beliefs are not your creation… but that simply isn’t true. You may have created them unconsciously or lazily or out of habit, but each and every belief in your mind is your creation. Even the belief that your beliefs are not changeable is your creation! What I am asking of you is that you take responsibility for your beliefs. Take responsibility for your creations. Be the conscious creator of your beliefs…not the victim of your unconsciously chosen beliefs.

Your mind is filled with all kinds of beliefs that you don’t remember choosing… that you take for granted… that you never question… that you never change. You believe that you are an American, or an Indian or a Christian or a Jew. You believe that you are handsome, or ugly or fat or funny. You believe you are smart or dumb or creative or helpless. You believe you are successful or unhappy or fearful or victimized. Do you realize that each unquestioned belief is a weight on your soul? Don’t you see that each unconscious belief is a nail in your coffin?! You are living life in the land of the dead… without clear understanding of why you believe what you believe or how you choose what you choose. You are literally drowning in a sea of unquestioned beliefs. All of your misery… all of your unhappiness… all of your discontent is born of these unconsciously chosen beliefs that you hold dear.

Consider this: Have you ever seen an adult elephant tied to a tree with a thin rope and wondered why it is that the animal does not free itself? The rope is so thin that the elephant could easily break free. Well, when the elephant was young, it was bound with heavy chains that could not be broken. It tried and tried to free itself without success. After awhile, the elephant created the belief that when it’s bound there is no way to free itself. So, it gave up trying. The elephant now has an unquestioned belief that binds it to the tree. Do you see? The rope does nothing but remind the elephant that it is trapped. The elephant’s belief is so strong that it can be bound by a pitiful bit of rope. This is a perfect analogy for you and the prison you have created for yourself with your own unquestioned beliefs. Just like the elephant, you are trapped by your thinking… by your beliefs… not by that which you imagine is trapping you.

Do you see the plasticity of your beliefs yet? Stay alert and you will see. How is it that you came to create the beliefs that you have? You chose them based on your experience. You chose them based on what you were told. You chose them based on faith! You have layer upon layer of chosen belief. So many of your beliefs were chosen without awareness and you suffer because of it. Open your mind and see the truth of this.

Do you want to stop your suffering? Do you want to be free of the imagined limitation of your beliefs? If so then choose again! Make another choice. Choose consciously what you want to believe. Question what you think is true. If you don’t like what you believe then believe something else. If what you believe now is causing you pains then don’t believe that anymore. The way out is so simple… it is so obvious… it is so clear that it’s one of the best kept secrets in the entire world. All you must do is to choose your way out of misery and into happiness and love.

How do you choose a belief? If that question truly engages you then you are well on your way to taking conscious control over The Image. This is the point where awareness becomes incredibly important to conscious living and words begin to falter. Be aware of your beliefs and you will see for yourself how they work. When I am aware of my beliefs, this is what I see: Belief is a choice and choice is pure creation. Ultimately, all belief is pure creation. You are the creator and The Image is your creation. Be aware of your beliefs and you may see the truth of this. Open your mind to the role of creation in choice and choice in belief. When you do this then you will finally see the limitless horizons that are before you… and nothing will be beyond your reach that you believe you can achieve.

What is freedom? Have you ever answered that question for yourself and with great interest? I have observed widespread false beliefs about freedom that create conflict and suffering for many. This conflict and the resulting suffering take many forms – including oppression, war, compulsory schooling, coercive government, argument, patriotism and divorce. The common thread that binds this conflict is a lack of clarity on what freedom is. Let’s take some time right now and drill into our ideas on freedom and cultivate a clear understanding of what it actually is.

What is freedom? Is it a lack of restriction? Is it the ability to do whatever you want whenever you want? I believe that most people would agree with that. However, there are subtleties there that you may not see. To have the ability to do whatever you want you must be free of all restrictions. That is not possible. At the minimum, you are bound by the restrictions placed on you by reality. For example, you are not free to live for long in the vacuum of space or to put the entire moon in your pocket. You cannot be in two places at once nor can you shrink yourself to the size of a pinhead. If you have no hands, you’re not free to finger paint. Isn’t it obvious that there are rules governing reality that you must work within? In essence, you are always operating under some kind of restriction – you are working within the rules of a system. Clearly freedom doesn’t come from a lack of restriction because there is no such thing as complete lack of restriction.

Does this mean that freedom comes from a minimization of restriction? Is it appropriate to say that freedom arises when there is less restriction placed on you? It seems to me that line of thinking is a trap that leads us away from clear vision on freedom. Let’s consider some examples to be sure. Consider a newborn human baby, for example. A newborn baby has no ability to talk. They cannot form words or communicate concepts until they have matured enough and learned enough to do so. Is a newborn baby less free than an older child with a command of speech? It seems to me that the answer is no. They are both equally free because they make choices based on the restrictions that they are confronted with. Consider a man that loses his sight at the age of 22. Before that age the man had full use of his eyes. Is the man less free because of the new restrictions placed on him from his loss of vision? Of course not…he is just as free as he was before his sight was lost. Just like the newborn, he’s simply subject to new rules and is making choices based on his situation.

It’s clear to me that freedom has nothing to do with the inherent capabilities of the body. Yet, does this also apply to restrictions placed on you by others? Does a government that drafts you into its military against your will reduce your freedom? If something is done to you against your will, are you less free? It seems that most people would answer that with a resounding yes! Still… I can’t help but question whether or not that is true. If you look closely at this, isn’t it the same situation as unwanted changes in your body? The man that loses his sight didn’t desire the situation any more than the person being drafted into military service. Both are simply operating under new rules and are making choices based on their situation.

What does this tell you about freedom? What it tells me is this: Lack of freedom is the violation of an ideal situation that exists only in The Image. Lack of freedom is an illusion created by a conflict of reality and The Image. If you believe you are free then you are free. If you believe you are not free then you are not free. Freedom, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. Isn’t this obvious?

If lack of freedom is an illusion of The Image, what does that tell you about freedom? Doesn’t it mean that freedom simply is? Indeed it does... freedom simply is. Freedom is the ability to choose. You always have a choice in every situation. Now, some choices are more desirable than others. For example, you may pay your taxes because you feel that the alternative of jail time is not acceptable. Yet, the value of a choice doesn’t make it vanish. Being coerced into paying taxes is no different than steering around a dangerous obstacle on the freeway. You are always exercising your ability to choose between alternatives based on your current situation.

You are not having the experience of freedom right now because you believe that you are not free. Your focus on The Image of restriction is what keeps you from experiencing your freedom right now. The more you focus on your restrictions, the more you will strive to reduce them. The peculiar thing is that striving to reduce your restrictions will never make you free – the best it can do is increase the menu of alternatives to choose between. In most cases, your focus on restriction simply feeds your discontent.

Do you want to experience your freedom? If so then see clearly that you are already free in this moment now. It is not possible to be more or less free. You are as free now as you ever will be. If you feel that you are not free then you’re not seeing clearly. Indeed, it is your focus on imagined restrictions that keeps you from exercising your freedom. See clearly that you always make choices based on the rules of the system that you believe you are in. If you don’t like the rules that bind you then change them if you can. If you can’t change them then accept them and choose accordingly. What value is there in torturing yourself through conflict with the reality of your situation?

Have you ever considered what words are and how they work? It seems to me that many people have some pretty interesting ideas about words. Some of these ideas are not only interesting, but incredibly dangerous. To communicate properly with words we must fully understand what they are and how they work. If we cannot communicate properly with words then we can be easily misled by the words of others. That is the danger. Let’s take some time right now and dig to the very foundation of our image of words and see if we can’t immunize ourselves from the dangers of words.

What are words? Words are shapes and sounds in reality that we have assigned meaning to in The Image. Words are concepts, ideas and memories. Words are social conventions where we have agreed that certain shapes and sounds mean particular things. Isn’t this obvious? Most of the words we use are not our own creation, but the creation of others. We have been trained to use the words that our society agreed to. Our society’s words have been programmed into us from a very young age. This simple fact is the first aspect of the danger of words. We are so used to using words and so thoroughly accepting of them that we don’t take time to question what they are.

Words are not magical. There are no special powers in the written word or the spoken word. There is no such thing as a “holy word” or an “offensive word”. Similarly, there is no such thing as an “important word” or a “touching word” or the “word of god”. In reality, words are simply shapes and sounds that we have assigned meaning to in The Image. This is the second aspect of the danger of words. When we believe that words are magical or special then we open ourselves to being misled. Think about it… if we believe that a text is filled with magical words then we may believe the words no matter what they say. If we think that someone’s words are divinely inspired then we will assign them great value and may be easily misled.

Words have no built-in meaning. In reality, words are only shapes and sounds that we have assigned meaning to in The Image. This means that we decide what words mean based on our image’s interpretation of them. Give that some awareness and you may see the power of it. Give awareness to the process that takes place in your mind as you read this text. Your eyes perceive the text. The perceived words are identified in your mind by comparing the perception to your memory. It’s almost like you have a dictionary in your mind that you use to translate pictures and sounds into possible meanings. As you identify each word in the text, you build an image of the sentence, paragraph and entire text. This image is your personal interpretation of the words that you have experienced. You interpret the text and decide its meaning. You are not discovering meaning in words; you are deciding and creating meaning in words. This is the third aspect of the danger of words. If we believe that words have built-in meanings then we may get stuck trying to figure out what the words really mean. We will spend hours sifting through important words trying to see the hidden meaning. If someone else comes along and tells us they have discovered a hidden meaning then we will be open to being misled. There is no hidden meaning. There is only the meaning that you give the words.

Since words have no meaning outside of the meaning we give them then it should be clear that words are very easily misinterpreted. They are seemingly designed to be misinterpreted. Different people will create different meanings for the exact same set of words. You’ve seen this happen before, right? Haven’t you ever disagreed with someone over the meaning they have assigned to some words? The biggest barrier to accurately communicating with words is getting to a common ground for what the words mean. I hope that you see that this common ground is quite impossible to reach. My concept of “dog” is very different from yours. My concept of “pizza” is not the same either. For any given word, my concepts, memories and ideas are distinct from yours. As are yours from everyone else’s. Misinterpretation of words is so common that this should be obvious to everyone. Yet, it isn’t. People go through life believing that their interpretations are correct… that it is other people who are mistaken. The secret here is that nobody’s interpretation is correct. They are simply personal interpretations that you either agree with or don’t.

The irony of using words to describe the illusion of words is not lost on me. I see that clearly and find it quite amusing. How does one get across the idea that words are to be distrusted and scrutinized when using words? It’s a dichotomy that I enjoy swimming in a great deal. Please keep in mind that my words are not special. There is no special meaning hidden in these pages. There are only shapes and sounds that you are deciding to assign meaning to. I’m out of the picture on this after the words are written. I hope you create a meaning that helps you break your dependence on the magic and meaning of words.

You don’t want to be misled, do you? If not then see clearly how you interpret words. Be aware of how you read and listen. Be aware of how you speak and write. Watch yourself as you assign meaning to words. Watch yourself as you try to coerce others to assign certain meaning to your words. If you watch this then you will finally see.

Once you see the true value of words then you will understand that each holy text that you hold dear (either religious or political) is a sham…it is an illusion that mesmerizes you and keeps you from your power of conscious belief. When you see this clearly then you have the opportunity to take conscious control over the meaning that you create from words. Right now, you create meaning out of habit, not choice. Now that you see the illusion of words you can choose the meaning that you want instead of searching for a meaning that isn’t there.

The fundamental error that many people make in their search for love is to misunderstand what love is and how it arises in the human heart. Love is not a feeling, it is a movement… it is a process. Because of this movement feelings happen. The feelings that come from the process of love are not all that important—and very difficult to put into words. So, let’s instead focus our awareness on the movement of love. Let’s go deeply into this and see if we can’t come to a new discovery about love together.

What is the movement of love? The movement of love begins when you are in direct contact with reality. Love starts when you watch reality with your awareness. Once you are deeply aware of reality then something strange happens… you begin to understand what you are aware of. When you experience the understanding that comes from awareness then you will love. Watch and you will see. See and you will understand. Understand and you will love. This is the movement of love.

What do I mean by: “Watch and you will see”? I mean that you should be aware of reality. Be aware of what is happening within you and around you. Be aware of what you’re thinking and feeling. See what you are seeing. Hear what you are hearing. Taste what you are tasting. Feel what you are feeling. Get into direct contact with your senses. Most of the time, you’re not in direct contact with reality. You’re focused on the content of your mind… your thoughts, your memories, your hopes and fears. You’re focused on The Image, not reality. To start the movement of love you must get out of The Image and get back to your senses. Withdraw your attention from your thoughts and put it on the sensations in your body and mind. Be aware of your awareness, keep your attention there and you will see. This is the beginning of the movement of love.

What do I mean by: “See and you will understand”? I mean that understanding comes from direct contact with reality. It is automatic. Most people believe that understanding is a product of thought. They believe that to understand something that you must first think about it. This is a false belief. First comes the understanding of a thing then the thoughts about it arise. Even when you seemingly come to understanding through thought, it is your understanding of thoughts that you came to through awareness that make it possible. Thought without understanding is not possible. Understanding without thought is sublime. Being aware of a thing as it is in reality gives you understanding. Not technical understanding, but an intuitive understanding of whatever it is that is in your awareness. Yes, it is intuitive understanding that is the second part of the movement of love.

What do I mean by: “Understand and you will love”? I mean that love comes from your intuitive understanding of reality. When you intuitively understand what is in your awareness then you are filled with love. It is automatic and takes no effort whatsoever. The form that this love takes is unpredictably perfect. It is a feeling that is exactly correct for the given situation that you find yourself in. It can be tender and compassionate or hard and unyielding. It can move you to tears as you drive your car or keep you stoic in the face of atrocity. It can be blissful beyond words or it can be a deep calmness like the ocean depths. It is unpredictable… and if you can predict it then it’s not love that you’re feeling. If you can predict it then you are experiencing a product of The Image and not love at all.

The movement of love begins with awareness of reality. Understanding of reality comes from your awareness of reality. When you understand reality you will love reality and automatically give the perfect response to whatever is before you. Let your awareness of reality drive you, not the cunningness of your thoughts. Use your thoughts as the tools they are, but do not believe them. Use them like a carpenter uses wood and nails, but don’t get caught up in them. Belief in The Image – in your thoughts—is a killer of love. When you do this… when you get into direct contact with reality… then you will finally experience love. It is unavoidable. It is addicting. It is empowering. It is love! Taste this for even a moment and you will never be the same.

Do you need help to achieve this? Practice your awareness. Be aware of when you are aware and when you are not. Pay attention to what is happening. See clearly your thinking and your emotions as they occur. Look at the sky. Listen to the cars and the rain and the frogs and the reality around you. Smell the freshness of the morning air and the staleness of a smoggy evening commute. Touch the soft skin of a loved one or the roughness of sandpaper. Taste the sweetness of chocolate and the bitterness of limes. Watch your thoughts and reactions as you would watch the clouds in the sky. Revel in the pain of your body and the pleasures of your mind. Be in your body! Be in your body! Be in your body! This is the key. Get out of your mind and get back to your senses. If you do this then you will know love as the unavoidable, not the unattainable.

Watch and you will see. See and you will understand. Understand and you will love.

So many people spend their time seeking happiness from the world outside of them. They look for happiness to come when the world is right… when things are going their way. Of course, because they believe that their happiness only arises when the world is right, they strive to make sure the world meets their expectations. This is how so many people live their lives. They work so hard to make the world meet their demands in order to be happy. Do these seekers of happiness ever find what they are looking for?

Are you one of these people that seek their happiness in this way? If so, have you ever considered how truly fruitless all of your efforts have been? Haven’t you noticed how your seeking of happiness has become a never-ending quest to achieve what you do not have? How many times have you found lasting happiness through making the world meet your expectations? Isn’t it clear to you that each time you find this “happiness” it only lasts as long as the world continues to meet your expectations? This fact alone should give you a clue as to the true nature of happiness.

What is the true nature of happiness? Put simply, happiness is a choice. You choose if you are happy or not in any given situation. What you believe about a thing will determine if you are happy about it or not. Isn’t this obvious? For example, if you hear of a random person being diagnosed with cancer, you might feel sorry for them. Yet, if you learned from your doctor that you had cancer, your reaction would be much different. The important difference between these two situations is only what you believe about them.

The subtlety here is why you make the choice to avoid happiness. Yes, you make that choice often. Every time you’re unhappy it’s because you’ve chosen to be. You keep narrowly avoiding happiness through your choice of belief. What do you believe in so much to keep choosing it over happiness? Expectations and attachment… An expectation is a belief that the world should be a certain way. Attachment is a strong belief that, in order to be happy, your expectations must be met. Your belief in expectations and your attachment to them is so strong that you choose them over your happiness in almost every case.

You literally have hundreds of expectations on those that touch your life. You expect people close to you to act a certain way… or to believe certain things… or to keep their word… or to be kind to you. Are you aware of these expectations? Can you see them clearly in your mind, or do you just see them as “how things need to be”? How did you come to have these expectations? Isn’t it that you were taught most of them by your parents or other authority figures in your life? You may have come to some of these expectations on your own after suffering some great loss or tragedy. In any case, aren’t these expectations learned? And, once something is learned, doesn’t it only have reality in your mind? Belief in an expectation is what gives it power. If you don’t like an expectation because it causes pains then simply believe something else and the pains will stop.

Your attachment to your expectations is another part of the puzzle. It’s not bad enough that we believe in expectations, oh no. We also believe that our expectations must be met or else we cannot be happy. This simple belief drives us to change the world to meet our expectations… it is the core belief that keeps us from our happiness. If you want to be happy then you must come to understand this belief and choose to disbelieve it!

Belief is a choice that we make based on our experience. Our belief in attachment is a choice based on what we’re taught by others. From a very young age, we’re programmed to be happy only when we’re meeting expectations. “Don’t touch that.” “Do your homework.” “Tell the truth.” “Lose some weight.” “Clean your plate.” We’re literally drowned in the expectations laid down by our parents and society. As we experience the unhappy aftermath of not meeting expectations we learn that meeting expectations is the only way to be happy. Is it any wonder we suffer from this neurotic desire to make the world meet our idea about it?

The good news is that this belief in attachment and expectation is totally based on your choice. You can choose not to believe that the world has to be a certain way. Indeed, you can choose to believe that your happiness does not depend on how the world is. How do you do this? First, you must see clearly how your attachment to expectations causes you to be unhappy. Be aware of yourself as you are happy and unhappy and you will see the truth of it.

If you clearly see how your expectations kill your happiness then you will revolt against the belief that powers them. Yes, just by seeing expectations for the killers of happiness they are you may break free of them. But, you must see this for yourself – not as some idea in The Image—but as the reality it is. You must see this firsthand. Then, just as you would brush a newly discovered poisonous scorpion off your shoulder, you will brush away the belief that expectations must be met in order to be happy.

Do you want to be happy? If so, then get to the task of seeing your expectations. Get busy observing your attachment to your expectations. Watch how your expectations ruin your happiness. Understand that attachment is only a belief. Love the new freedom to be happy that you have discovered.

If your house was on fire, what would you do? Surely, as soon as you became aware of the fire, you would call the fire department or grab your fire extinguisher and put out the flames. Wouldn’t your number one goal would be to stop the fire and limit the damage to your property? The desire for immediate action in such a situation seems to be universal. Why is it that this sense of urgency is missing when it comes to putting out the fire of your emotional pain?

When you’re suffering from emotional pain, what do you do? In most cases, don’t you act out to change something in the world to make your pain stop? When you’re confronted with someone that irritates you, don’t you seek to avoid them or change them in some way? When you encounter a situation that frightens you, don’t you try to get away from the source of your fear? When you see something that saddens you, aren’t you sometimes moved to improve the situation and lessen your sadness? The fire of your emotional pain causes you discomfort and so you try to change the world to make the pain stop. This is obvious, isn’t it?

Seeking to change the world in order to put out your emotional fire is like pouring water on your neighbor’s house when your house is burning. It really is that silly… and equally pointless. The mistake that most people make is to confuse the world as the cause of their emotional fire. In truth, your emotional fire is always burning. The world simply provides fuel for the flame that already exists. When you act to change the world, you’re just trying to move the fuel off of the existing flame. If you wish to be free of your emotional fire then you must attack the source of the flame.

What is the source of your emotional flame? It is your comparison of The Image to the world that causes your flame to burn. It is your thinking about the world that causes the flame of emotional pain to burn. If you wish to be free of the fires of emotional pain then you must change what you think about the world. Seeking to change the world doesn’t put out the fire; it merely moves the fuel around. As long as your thoughts about the world are conflicted your emotional fire will always burn.

To see this clearly you must see it directly. Observe how your discontent with the world is always present in your mind. This discontent – this conflict between The Image and reality—is the emotional fire. Watch yourself as you continually find things to be upset about. No matter how the world appears you will find some reason to be upset about it.

The key to putting out this emotional fire is to see it clearly. You wouldn’t try to put out your house fire with your eyes closed, would you? The best way I know of to see the fire is to observe yourself as you are having emotional pain. Your conflicted thoughts about the world are quite clear when you’re in the midst of your emotional pain. Your inner dialogue will tell you exactly why you are creating the pain. Simply being aware of this inner dialogue will help you to see clearly why you are in pain. You must strike while the iron is hot if you want to catch your conflicted thoughts. The longer you wait from the moment of pain to observe your conflict, the harder it is to see.

Your thinking about the world is the emotional flame that causes you so much pain. You compare reality to The Image and dislike what you see. So, you turn up the flame of emotional pain and suffer for it. Do you want to be free of this self-created fire? If so, then you must strike while the iron is hot… you must observe your thinking as you are in pain. Don’t wait until the pain subsides. Watch it while it’s burning you! Once you see the conflict within you then you will understand why you are in pain. Watch and you will see your conflict. See your conflict and you will understand the cause. Understand the cause and you can finally extinguish the flame. Put out the fire of your emotional pain and you will experience freedom from pain and a peace that cannot be disturbed by the world around you.

Why is it that throughout the world, people find themselves in life situations that they dislike but they seem powerless to do anything about? People all over the world are stuck in relationships that make them miserable. These relationships are with other people and also things. Some people are miserable with their marriage. Some people are miserable with their job. Some people are miserable with their religion. Some people are miserable with themselves. Why is this happening? Why can’t people free themselves from their misery in relationship?

It seems to me that the mistake these sufferers of misery make is to confuse the cause of their misery. They are miserable and believe that their misery is caused by things outside of themselves. What they don’t see clearly is how misery is caused by them and their thinking. External reality has nothing to do with misery. This is the fundamental error.

What happens when you act out of confusion? In such a state, aren’t your actions also confused? When people act to try and solve their misery, they seldom achieve their goal because their actions are confused. When your action comes from the idea that the world outside of you is wrong then you will strive to make the world meet your ideas of “rightness”. Such world-changing actions rarely, if ever, solve the fundamental cause of misery. Such actions may offer temporary relief from the symptoms of misery, but misery will visit again in time.

If you’re miserable in your marriage then you may strive to make your partner stop doing whatever it is they are doing that makes you miserable. Perhaps it’s their nagging that makes you miserable. Or, perhaps it’s their lack of attention that makes you miserable. It may even be that you just don’t love them anymore and so you feel miserable just by staying with them. Leaving the marriage is one way to solve the misery but the solution is temporary. Perhaps you get married again and find the same faults and problems in your next partner. Perhaps you stay unmarried and miss the company of a life partner. Isn’t it clear that the misery will visit you again no matter how you try to fix your marriage? Misery in marriage has nothing to do with your partner… it has everything to do with your thinking about your partner.

If you are miserable in your job then you may strive for better working conditions or fairer treatment or better pay. You may even quit and look for a better job that doesn’t have all of the problems that your old job did. When you do this, don’t you notice similar misery with your next job? Given enough time, after the excitement of a new job wears off, the same miserable feelings will creep up on you again. You’ll start seeing faults in your workplace that give you reason to complain and feel bad again. So the cycle repeats itself. Isn’t it clear that the misery will visit you again no matter how you try to fix your job? Misery in the workplace has nothing to do with your job… it has everything to do with your thinking about your job.

If you are miserable in your life then you may strive to better yourself in some way. Perhaps you’ll give up smoking or start a new diet. You may exercise more or read a self-help book. You might talk to a therapist or change careers. You may even buy a new game or watch a movie or get high to avoid the misery. Regardless of what you do to change the miserable conditions of your life, don’t you see that they are temporary fixes? Don’t you see that misery will visit you again no matter how you try to fix your life? Misery in life has nothing to do with life… it has everything to do with your thinking about your life.

People have a desire for change but, because that desire is confused, it only leads to more misery. Changing the outside world to meet your desire is not the way out of misery. No matter what you do to the world outside of you, the misery will return. You know the truth of this… just look at your own life of misery. How many times have you strived to change the outside world because of your misery? How many times have you succeeded in freeing yourself from misery this way? Sure, for a short time your action relieves the symptoms. But, like the effects of a drug, the relief is only temporary. And, like the effects of a drug, you become more resistant to the symptom relief the more you use it. The longer you rely on changing the external world to stop your misery the more misery you will find. It’s a never-ending cycle of pain and misery that will never bring you happiness.

Do you want to free yourself from misery? If so, then see clearly how misery is caused by your thinking. See clearly how your belief in The Image over reality gives birth to your misery. Reality is here now, in your senses, and you’re focusing on The Image of your marriage or your job or your life. Do you want to be free of misery once and for all? If you truly desire this then you must turn your desire inward and become aware. Your desire for change is confused and misdirected toward those things that, even if you change them, won’t bring you a moment of freedom from misery.

Misery is caused by your belief in The Image over reality. Observe this in your own life and you will see. Watch and you will see. See and you will understand. Understand and you will finally be free of misery and filled to the brim with love of life – whatever your situation is.

Many people in the world see spiritual enlightenment as an important goal to achieve during their lifetime. These people read books; visit with gurus, practice meditation and follow practices prescribed by their spiritual leaders in the hope that they too will achieve the state of being called “enlightenment”. Perhaps you too are one of the people that seek this thing called enlightenment. Let’s dig into this thing called enlightenment and see if we can enlighten ourselves as to what it is and what it means.

What is enlightenment? If one is to seek a thing then one must know what it is they are seeking. Isn’t that obvious? So, what is enlightenment? Is it a state of continual bliss where all of your problems melt away? Is it a freedom from immaturity? Is it an understanding that transcends all knowledge? Is it clear vision? I imagine that if I asked 100 people what enlightenment is I would receive dozens of different answers. Most people would simply regurgitate what they’ve heard about enlightenment from others. This is because, for most people, enlightenment is something that has not been experienced… and so they rely on the descriptions of others.

Do you see the fundamental problem with that? If you are seeking something based on what others are telling you then how will you know when you find it? For one thing, how do you know that those who are describing enlightenment have actually found it? They may have found something wonderful and are trying to share it with you—I can certainly understand that point of view since I’m trying to share something wonderful that I have found with you. Yet, if someone says to you “I’m enlightened and here’s how you can be enlightened too”, how can you be sure that they’re speaking from direct experience? I would hope, by now, that you would see clearly that you cannot be sure. Isn’t it clear that you’re taking it on faith and belief alone? You’ve read something or heard something or seen something that you take as the truth. The Image is telling you that this person has achieved something that you have not and you want to achieve it too. The description of this “something wonderful” becomes a goal for you to achieve. The problem is that once you take on this goal you’ve made it quite impossible to achieve the goal.

Enlightenment has become a goal for so many people. It’s a goal that has been sought by millions of people for a very long time. People try to achieve what has only been described to them through the words of others. They have not experienced enlightenment so they cannot know when they’re having the experience. So, these seekers go through life looking for something they cannot recognize even if they find it. They meditate and cannot find it. They pray and cannot find it. They study and cannot find it. They contemplate and cannot find it. Do you see how it is the seeking of something described that is causing enlightenment never to be found? Seekers of enlightenment are looking for something that they only have a concept of. They have a concept built in The Image… not a memory from their own experience, but a concept from the words of others. Not seeing this, the seekers keep looking for something that cannot be found through comparison to the words and concepts of others. Not knowing this, the seekers are looking for an illusion of enlightenment – not enlightenment itself. Is it any wonder that so few seekers become finders?

Did you know that you’re having the experience of enlightenment right now? The only thing keeping you from recognizing the experience is The Image of enlightenment you have in your mind. You keep having the experience but you do not recognize it because you hold on so tightly to your concept of enlightenment. You’re looking for hot when the actual experience is cold. You’re looking for sweet when the actual experience is sour. You’re looking for happiness when the actual experience is sadness. Once again, you’ve confused The Image with reality and cannot see what is actually happening within and around you. You are enlightened right now but you haven’t realized it yet.

Look at it this way: If someone came to you and said that chocolate tastes like mustard, would you believe them? Of course not… If you have tasted both chocolate and mustard then you would see immediately the foolishness of the claim. Yet, when someone comes to you and describes something that you have not experienced then be careful! If you take their description to heart then you will be unable to recognize what they’ve described when you come upon it. Believing the description of something that you have not experienced taints your future experience. Imagine that you have tasted chocolate and not mustard. If you believed the description of mustard tasting like chocolate then you would have a very clear expectation in your mind. In this state of belief, if you came across mustard and tasted it, you’d never recognize it as mustard because you’re expecting chocolate! That’s the issue. You’re expecting chocolate when enlightenment is actually mustard.

Do you want to see enlightenment for what it really is? If so then you must drop all your ideas about enlightenment. You must discard all of your formulas and concepts about enlightenment. How can you do that? See clearly that your ideas about enlightenment are the barrier that stops you from seeing enlightenment. Look unflinchingly at how accepting a description as truth taints your future experience. Be willing to see for yourself the actuality of enlightenment in this moment now and you will see it. Enlightenment isn’t to be found by comparing reality to what others have told you. Don’t confuse your illusion of enlightenment with enlightenment itself. Do you want to see enlightenment as it really is? If so then see reality as it really is and enlightenment will be upon you.

As you interact with reality, you are recording memories, forming ideas and making conclusions about what you observe. These memories, ideas and conclusions are what I call The Image. We each have our own private image based on our own life experience. Consider, for a moment, how The Image that you have of reality causes all of your emotional pain and excitement in life. Is it clear to you how this works?

When there is conflict between your image and reality then you experience emotional pain and upset. The kind of emotional pain that you experience depends on the nature of the conflict in your mind. Consider a time that you were angry or jealous or sad about something in your life. Perhaps your wife left you or something precious to you was stolen or someone called you an insulting name. In each case, wasn’t there a conflict between how you wished the world was and how it actually was? It is this conflict between how you want reality to be and how it actually is that causes your emotional pain. It is the conflict between The Image and reality that causes emotional pain.

When there is agreement between your image and reality then you experience emotional pleasure and excitement. The kind of emotional pleasure that you experience depends on the nature of the agreement in your mind. Consider a time that you were happy or content or pleased about something in your life. Perhaps you got that bonus that you worked so hard for or you received a compliment from someone that you like or you felt particularly attractive in the mirror one morning. In each case, wasn’t there agreement between how you wished the world was and how it actually was? It is this agreement between how you wish reality to be and how reality actually is that causes your emotional pleasure. It is agreement between The Image and reality that causes emotional excitement and pleasure.

This relationship between The Image and reality – its ability to create emotional pain and pleasure – is of great interest to me. It seems that if you can control The Image then you can control your thoughts and emotions. If it’s possible to change The Image then you can select a new emotion when you find yourself in the midst of pain. Change The Image and you change your outlook and control your emotions. The question is: How can you change The Image?

It’s my experience that you can easily change The Image once you understand what it is and how it works. In its most basic form, The Image is memories and thoughts about those memories. Of course, you cannot change your memories, but you can change what you think about your memories. What does it mean to change what you think about your memories? It means to change what you believe about your memories and life experiences. Right now, you have countless unconscious and habitual beliefs about what you remember of your life. What I’m suggesting here is that you consciously choose what you believe instead of believing something just because it’s what you’ve always believed. This choosing of belief is a path to creating the thoughts and emotions you want instead of suffering from the emotions and thoughts that you’ve been programmed to have.

To understand this more deeply, let’s go into what a belief is. Have you ever considered what beliefs are and how they get into your image? Take some time right now to consider a belief that you have. Any belief will do, but it may be easier to see what I’m describing if you pick a belief that isn’t painful for you. The belief that I’m considering as I write this is my belief in the color red. Now that we’ve spent a few moments considering our beliefs, let’s answer some questions about them. Why is it that you have your belief? Think back and see if you can remember how the belief got into your mind. Isn’t it that you learned this belief through your experiences with the world? Perhaps someone taught you about the belief… or perhaps you learned about it on your own. In either case, isn’t it obvious that you created the belief based on your experience with reality? How do you create a belief? You create belief through choice based on experience. Your beliefs are, quite literally, chosen by you.

You experience reality and build The Image from your experiences. Your memory records experiences and you choose beliefs about your memory. These chosen beliefs also become memories and you choose beliefs about them as well. You have layer upon layer of chosen belief… each layer of belief building on another layer of belief. All of these “belief layers” rest atop the bedrock of your experience. The wonderful thing about this is if you choose a new belief or change an existing belief, it automatically affects and changes all of the beliefs that are related to it. And, the closer a belief is to the bedrock of experience, the more dramatic and powerful changing it can be. Have you ever considered what an epiphany is? Isn’t it just the feeling you get when a belief near the bedrock is changed? Oh, that’s a delicious feeling.

To change The Image is a matter of changing belief. The Image is, in part, what you believe it to be. You remember what you experience but you choose what you believe. If you are experiencing unwanted emotional pain then choose a new belief and dispel the pain. How can you choose a new belief? The same way you chose your old beliefs… through faith in your experience and in other beliefs.

Do you want to change The Image to suit your tastes and choices? If so, then see clearly how you choose your beliefs based on both your experience and other beliefs. See the value of faith in belief. You take so many beliefs on faith alone. Be aware of your mind and the thoughts that you have when you feel emotional excitement and pain. Understand how those thoughts, and the resulting emotions, are given power through your belief in them. If you truly wish to change The Image and take conscious control of your mind then you must become a master of your belief. Belief is the key to power over The Image and your creation.

If there was just one thing I could share with you it would be this: Get into direct contact with reality. Touch reality. Smell reality. Taste reality. Hear reality. See reality. Sense reality. Feel it. Being out of contact with reality is the cause of every emotional pain you have ever had.

Let me tell you what I mean when I say reality. It's important that you understand clearly what I mean when I use that word. Put simply: Reality doesn't exist outside of your sense of it. At this instant, reality only exists from your point of view and it extends only to the limits of your perception. There is nothing more to reality than your current fleeting sense of it. Reality is your perception.

The prevailing view is that reality exists separately from us and we experience it through our senses. This is what we've all been taught. However, is that true? How do you know that there is an external reality? You sense it, don't you? You have never experienced reality outside of your senses. So, how can you say that reality is separate from your senses?

As you sense reality, you build an image of reality in the form of memories. The feeling of reality existing separately from your senses comes from your focus on those memories and your ideas about those memories. The separation of object from sense is an illusion of the mind. You don't feel reality. Reality is your feeling.

How is it that being out of contact with reality causes emotional pain? It's really simple. When you're in contact with reality, you're focused on the sensations in your mind and body. When you're out of contact with reality, you're focused on the thinking in your mind. When you're in contact with reality, you feel the thinking in your mind and watch it. When you're out of contact with reality, you believe what you think and react to it. When you're in contact, you clearly see The Image and are not confused by it. When you're out of contact, you believe you are The Image and are lost in it.

So, how can you be in contact with reality? Get out of The Image and get back to your senses. But, wait a minute! Did you know that there's an extra sense they don't teach you about in school? There are the five bodily senses: touch, smell, taste, hearing and sight. There is also a sixth sense: awareness. Awareness is what allows you to feel the other five. It's also the sense that lets you "hear" your thinking... or "see" the memory of a loved-one's face. Awareness is the most important sense. It is the primary sense.

To get in contact with reality, you must be aware of your awareness. You must focus on your awareness because your awareness is where it all happens. Everything you ever feel or sense or remember or think happens in your awareness. Awareness is where the rubber meets the road, so to speak. It's the nexus point of your life experience. That's where you will find reality... not in your concepts or formulas.

Reality is the sensation of thought, not the content of thought. Reality is the saltiness of a potato chip, not the idea of saltiness. Reality is the pain of a broken arm, not the concept of bones or breaks. Reality is the feeling of having a memory, not the content of the memory. Reality is to be found in the living freshess of your current sensory experience, not in the deadness and sameness of your memory.

Do you see this? Is it clear to you? Are you here with me?

When you are in contact with reality -- aware of your body, mind and awareness -- your experience is completely different. You see the true value of your thoughts, beliefs and conclusions. You intuitively understand the value of your ideas, customs and dogmas. You see that such conceptual living isn't living at all. It's like living through proxy. It's like experiencing life through an actor or a symbol or a string of words. It's like living your life by remote control. Life is happening here and now in your current experience. It is happening in your senses now. It is not to be found in the deadness of your thoughts and memories.

The difference between these two experiences is beyond words. It's like opening your eyes to a beautiful world that you have lived in unaware all your life. It is bliss. It is love. It is wonder and beauty and peace and power. Once you are in contact with reality you will see for yourself. Do it now and you will see. What are you waiting for?

What is love? Have you ever given that question much attention? Have you taken time to really go deeply into your image of love? Take some time now and let's use our awareness to penetrate to the very core of what love is. If you do this, you may see something startling about love. If you do this, you will have the opportunity to see love for what it really is.

It will help you a great deal to think of someone that you love as we go into this. Keep your memory of the person you love in mind as you read and answer the coming questions.

Is love compassion? It seems that many people see that compassion comes from love. Yet, are love and compassion the same thing? When you are compassionate towards someone, isn't it that you feel sorry for them? Isn't it that you see something in them or their behavior that is less than perfect by your reckoning? So, compassion seems to come from the idea of superiority. You compare yourself to the other and see in them something that you have already overcome. So you feel bad for them and compassion arises. Clearly this isn't love. Compassion isn't love.

Is love desire? It seems that many people say "I love you" when desire is in their hearts. Yet, are love and desire the same thing? When you desire someone, isn't it because you get some kind of good feeling from them? You interact with your desired person and have all manner of good feelings within your mind and body. Aren't these good feelings caused by the object of your desire meeting your image of how they should be? "He's so smart." "She's so hot." "He takes an interest in my day." "She loves to give me sex." "He makes a good living." "She cooks really well." Aren't these statements of desire? Don't these kind of statements tell you that the object of your desire is simply meeting your expectations? What happens when your expectations change? What happens when the object of your desire changes and no longer meets your expectations? Doesn't your desire die then? Something that is so fleeting and tempermental isn't love. Clearly love isn't desire.

Is love the feeling of being desired? Is love the feeling of being wanted and appreciated? Surely when you are loved you feel desired, wanted and appreciated. Yet, aren't these feelings just another form of desire itself? You have an expectation in your mind telling you that to be loved you must be desired... that you must be wanted... that you must be appreciated. When someone meets those expectations, you feel loved. When they don't you feel rejected. Clearly, this is just another form of desire. This isn't love.

Is love the drive to protect and cherish another? It seems that many people who say "I love you" feel as though they should protect the ones they love. So, they keep a watchful eye on their beloved and help keep them from danger. Yet, isn't this also a form of desire? We become attached to those that give us good feelings. We come to rely on them for the drug of good feelings that they give us. What does that tell you about our drive to protect and cherish another? Isn't it just a matter of us protecting our drug? Don't we want to keep the other around to make us feel good? There it is. Another form of desire. Clearly, the drive to protect and cherish another is not love.

The deeper you go into the symptoms and behaviors of love, the clearer it becomes that they are not love at all. The symptoms and behaviors of love are not love at all. They are conventions. They are expectations that we have about how those that "love" us should act. If they act in the ways we expect then they "love" us and we make good feelings in our body. If they act in ways that we don't expect then they don't "love" us and we make bad feelings in our body.

Clearly, this form of expectation-based love is an illusion of our mind. It is a result of our upbringing and programming. It is a construct of The Image that keeps us from seeing love at all.

So, what is love? Have you found it yet? Drop your belief in the illusion of love that you have in your mind and you will have the opportunity to see love.

Seeing love. That's the most beautiful statement about love that I can conceive of. Because, to love something you must first see it. How can you love something that you cannot even see? As we focus on The Image we don't see what is really before us. In this state what we are loving is not real, it is an illusion of the mind. So, to see love, you must first see reality.

Once you see reality then you will love. It is quite effortless and happens automatically. Love is the result of seeing reality. Yet, we've confused it with the highs and lows of desire and dependence. Let me say that again, just in case you missed it: Love is the result of seeing reality.

Do you want to experience this love? If so, then see. Put your attention on reality and withdraw it from the illusion of your mind's image. See clearly how your dependence and desire isn't love at all... it's addiction. Watch yourself as you interact with your beloved and see the actual truth of this. One moment you're loving and the next moment you're unloving. When you're getting your drug then you feel loving. When you're not getting your drug then you feel unloving. This is the behavior of an addict, not a lover.

Waking up to love requires just one simple act of seeing. The love born of this clear sight comes without condition. It simply is. You will love regardless of the drug you are getting.

Watch and you will see.

See and you will understand.

Understand and you will love.